Laura's Life Sketches

Samantha Testimony
Presented by husband and Laura at Cornerstone Baptist Church
(And to you--all our family and friends)
June 17th, 2007

Introduction
Most of you know that our family is in the midst of a trial. Our daughter Samantha is dying from large hole in her heart caused from a condition known as Trisomy 18. Some days she appears very weak, and other days fairly strong, but the medical tests indicate she will live perhaps a few more months. Although I am certain that many of you have experienced and continue to experience trials as dark or even darker, I think it is worthwhile to speak publicly about the nature of our trial and the response of Grace from the Lord's hand. I am certain that the Lord encourages His church through testimonies of His Grace – however great or small the testing.

Ps 107:31-32 Oh, that men would give thanks to the LORD for His goodness, And for His wonderful works to the children of men! 32 Let them exalt Him also in the assembly of the people, and praise Him in the company of the elders. NKJV


Contentedness in God's providence.
We love raising children and we were so excited for this fourth little one to be added to our family. Though the news is over a month old to us we still shed tears at the thought of losing someone so precious to us. At the same time we know full well that the Lord gave Samantha life in His perfect will. We know that God made no mistakes when He knit her together in my womb.
Ps 139:14-16 I will praise You, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made; Marvelous are Your works, And that my soul knows very well. 15 My frame was not hidden from You, When I was made in secret, And skillfully wrought in the lowest parts of the earth. 16 Your eyes saw my substance, being yet unformed. And in Your book they all were written, The days fashioned for me, When as yet there were none of them.

Likewise Job 14:5 states, "Man's days are determined; you have decreed the number of his months and have set limits he cannot exceed"
We know that the Lord has measured out the number of her days no less accurately than for any of us. Yet we find it a difficult path to submit our hearts to these doctrines. It is hard to trust in the Lord's leading when your affections resist the path He has chosen.
In answer to this struggle we have been thinking about the context of Paul's confession in Phil 4:10-13.
But I rejoiced in the Lord greatly that now at last your care for me has flourished again; though you surely did care, but you lacked opportunity. 11 Not that I speak in regard to need, for I have learned in whatever state I am, to be content: 12 I know how to be abased, and I know how to abound. Everywhere and in all things I have learned both to be full and to be hungry, both to abound and to suffer need. 13 I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.

When Paul says he can do 'all things,' what are the 'things' he has in mind? The 'thing' he is able to do through Christ is be content in feast and in famine. Paul is saying here that whatever providences God puts before him, whatever the hardships, whatever the trials, ( v.11) "in whatever state I am… to be content." As I think of it, this is a humbling statement to hear from a man who has endured beatings, stoning, shipwreck, desertion, and all matter of abuse. I believe this also to be the spirit of Job when (after losing all of his sons and daughters) when he says "Shall we indeed accept good from God, and shall we not accept adversity?"

Laura and I can testify that it is humanly impossible to hold the doctrines of God's sovereignty in one arm and hold a dying child in the other. Christ, however, makes it possible for us. The peace and contentment we share through this trial is something we can only possess through Christ who strengthens us. It is hard to be content; it is hard to be satisfied; it is hard to conceive that the Lord can work in this trial for good. But whatever our lot, Christ is teaching us to say "though He slay me, yet will I trust Him."When peace, like a river, attendeth my way,When sorrows like sea billows roll;Whatever my lot, Thou has taught me to say, It is well, it is well, with my soul.

As a mother it is so easy to get caught up in a multitude of worries: what is she is suffering, should I shield the other children in any way. I need to continually bring these worries to the Lord in prayer. There are overwhelming days in which I find it a struggle to get out bed. I discover on those days that His Word is faithful and "His mercies are new every morning". It is only in Him I can find any joy. Left to myself I wouldn't be able to get through this heartache, but because I am His child He invites us to take to Him our sorrows, pain, discontentment and even unbelief.
Emoting with others - a praise of local church body
I think something of the heart of God is demonstrated when we see Jesus at the foot of Lazarus' tomb. Everyone knows the verse, "Jesus wept." But consider! Jesus knows full well that "to be absent from the body and to be present with the Lord." (2Cor 5:8) Why would he weep? He knows full well that, in a few hours, Lazarus would be eating and drinking in the presence of his family. I believe that Jesus demonstrates here a tender-hearted affection for the family of Lazarus so deep that genuine tears of sympathy stream down his face with unguarded selflessness. I am sure this is what Paul has in mind when he exhorts us to "Rejoice with those who rejoice, and weep with those who weep." Rom 12:15-16
You have done exactly this. We have been deeply touched by the kindness you have demonstrated. Gentle understanding words, silent prayers, plates of food, visits, phone calls, kind emails, and your many prayers encourage and sustain us. Many of you have had an arm around us and shed tears with us – and we have sensed such Christ-like love in this. Surely goodness and mercy have followed us – and the Lord has delivered them by your hand. You have been the instruments of God's grace and tender affection towards us.
He giveth more grace as our burdens grow greater,
He sendeth more strength as our labors increase;
To added afflictions He addeth His mercy,
To multiplied trials He multiplies peace.

When we have exhausted our store of endurance,
When our strength has failed ere the day is half done,
When we reach the end of our hoarded resources
Our Father's full giving is only begun.

His love has no limits, His grace has no measure,
His power no boundary known unto men;
For out of His infinite riches in Jesus
He giveth, and giveth, and giveth again.

You have been that grace to us. You who have spoken words of encouragement, cut our grass, brought us food, prayed for us – you have been the strength, mercy and peace God has multiplied unto us.
Hope for SalvationMy husband and I have struggled with many questions regarding Samantha and what the Bible says about the salvation of her soul. We want to share why we are able to rest confidently in the good news of the gospel – resting with hearts full of hope that we will see Samantha in glory. Our hope is based not on wishful thinking or man-made doctrines but on the nature of Salvation offered to us through Christ.

Consider Eph 2:3-10.
…we all once conducted ourselves in the lusts of our flesh, fulfilling the desires of the flesh and of the mind, and were by nature children of wrath, just as the others. But God, who is rich in mercy, because of His great love with which He loved us, 5 even when we were dead in sins, made us alive together with Christ (by grace you have been saved), 6 and raised us up together, and made us sit together in the heavenly places in Christ Jesus, 7 that in the ages to come He might show the exceeding riches of His grace in His kindness toward us in Christ Jesus. 8 For by grace you have been saved through faith, and that not of yourselves; it is the gift of God, 9 not of works, lest anyone should boast.

Some religions require a life of good works, penance, abstention, and all other matter of obligation. Of the salvation Jesus offers freely Spurgeon writes:
Let us never for a moment think that our [accepted] standing [before God] is in our sanctification, our mortification, our graces, or our feelings, but know that because Christ offered a full atonement, therefore we are saved; for we are complete in Him. Having nothing of our own to trust to, but resting upon the merits of Jesus—His passion [death] and holy life furnish us with the only sure ground of confidence.

Samantha has no good works to her merit. But God does not receive us on that account. If she stands on that last day justified it will be because she stands on the merits of Jesus Christ. This is the good news.

If you feel that your faith is too weak or the pile of your good works is too small to win acceptance with God, you have missed the gospel message. Christ offers full forgiveness, full atonement, and adoption into the family of the King of Kings. Do not wait for your faith to become strong. That day will never come. Do not wait until you have conquered your sins. Come to Christ bringing nothing and expecting eternal life with the Creator of the universe.

Rock of Ages, cleft for me,
Let me hide myself in Thee;
Let the water and the blood,
From Thy wounded side which flowed,
Be of sin the double cure;
Save from wrath and make me pure.

Not the labor of my hands
Can fulfill Thy law's demands;
Could my zeal no respite know,
Could my tears forever flow,
All for sin could not atone;
Thou must save, and Thou alone.

Nothing in my hand I bring,
Simply to the cross I cling;
Naked, come to Thee for dress;
Helpless look to Thee for grace;
Foul, I to the fountain fly;
Wash me, Savior, or I die.

While I draw this fleeting breath,
When mine eyes shall close in death,
When I soar to worlds unknown,
See Thee on Thy judgment throne,
Rock of Ages, cleft for me,
Let me hide myself in Thee.
There is a single passage of scripture that summarizes perfectly all that Laura and I have tried to communicate today.
1 Cor 15:55-58 "O Death, where is your sting ? O Hell, where is your victory?" 56 The sting of death is sin, and the strength of sin is the law. 57 But thanks be to God, who gives us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ. 58 Therefore, my beloved brethren, be steadfast, immovable, always abounding in the work of the Lord, knowing that your labor is not in vain in the Lord.