Growth

Judah is at that adorable stage. He is 4 months, approaching 5. Judah has been such a blessing to us all. He is the sweetest natured little guy. He melts the hearts of us all as he gives that toothless grin then snuggles in the crook of your neck. Sophie, Micah and Josh love to hold him all the time and look forward to his awake time. Overall, their fears of death are getting better each day. My little Micah still struggles with fear of him dying the most. Sometimes, at just a random happy moment, his little eyes will fill with tears and he'll whisper to me, "Mom, I don't want Judah to die...". I try to comfort him, encourage him and use that moment to be a teachable one. Sometimes I'm not so strong myself, though.

Watching Judah grow makes me so thankful for each new growing stage. It's impossible not to look back and think of Samantha who was about this age when she died. Developmentally, however, she remained at the infant stage. I love the infant stage very much. I'm thankful for the privilege of taking care of Samantha, who was the mother's dream and stayed at that cuddly infant stage. Yet at the same time, growth is so very much more appreciated. Now, the first smile, giggle, rolling over and reaching out is even more a priceless treasure that is not taken for granted. I'm thankful that God has made me more aware of this great gift of growth.